Things have been a little crazy here - Yuri is in California (he drove there this week -- poor thing is resting before starting his new job in San Jose on Monday). We're here, adjusting to our many changes.
They had all sorts of equipment out by the Bob area --- which of course we thought was for kids to check out....well....someone didn't realize that if they park a tractor by a toddler play area, that maybe kids will play on it...and maybe if they didn't want kids climbing on it -- it might be a good idea to park it some place else. Before we got shut down, we did enjoy the machines.
This picture so captures Victor -- having hi to the people below -- saying 'Hi! How You Doing?!' to them all. I saw it and I got a little teary. I speaks of hope to me -- and it reminds me that for all the tough times we've been slugging through -- it's going to be ok.
We went to Como, North Carolina to visit Sarah's family -- it was a joy for us all. Victor loved the freedom to RUN RUN RUN and see tractors (!!!) I loved the quiet and the space that rural living brings. I also really loved getting to meet Sarah's family -- place names and faces together - and I loved how welcoming they were to me and Victor. I had 101 blog posts in my mind throughout the weekend - thoughts of traveling with toddlers, fun with kids in the woods, letting kids find their own fun, books and other thoughts - but like most times, alas, I didn't jot those ideas down (gotta get better at that).
The boys are headed to California to visit my grandparents (while Yuri works, Victor hangs out with my grandparents). It's always a huge exercise in trust for me to let Victor travel like that.
I know he is always surrounded by people who care for him and watch him like a hawk -- but it's still hard as a mom to let him go 3,000 miles away like that. I think of how lucky Victor is that he gets to spend so much time with his great-grandparents -- hopefully deep in his head some memories of them will be imprinted in there.
Here's a lesson in don't leave them for a second -
We were in the process of getting ready to take the boys to the airport -- I was putting away all the toys that Victor had pulled out in his nap less afternoon (i.e.: all of them) and Yuri was carrying bags up and down the stairs -- the gate wasn't locked, so Victor went upstairs and poked around the diaper bag -- that had Yuri's meds for the trip in it (do you know where this is heading?).
Like most times when they are getting in trouble - it became strangely quiet.
Suddenly it hits you that it's quiet and as I went upstairs, I saw pills all over the carpet - vitamins, meds, and fish oil -- a pile of OH CRAP!
He was jumping on his bed, excited to go to the airport -- I asked him if he ate any medicine, he said no.....but I didn’t' want to trust that he knew what I was asking him -- so I took him to the bathroom and stuck my finger in his throat.
He gagged but didn't throw up.
I asked him to just throw up in my hand (like he had done when he was sick) but this was not something he was interested in. I tried it a couple more times with no luck.
I called his pedi to ask if they had any vomit inducing tricks - they said I should call poison control. By this time Yuri had accounted for all but one pill -- so I called poison control.
They were great -- asked lots of questions and said that he would be ok. The pill he might have scarfed is bitter, so they didn't think it was likely if he crunched it, he would swallow it because of the taste - and since he didn't have any white residue in his mouth, the poison control lady was pretty sure he didn't have anything and would be ok. The pill in question is for ADD/Anxiety so it wouldn't hurt him if he had 1 -- 100..maybe, but one would just make him sleepy.
But to she told me to
1. Stop sticking my finger in his mouth
2. Give him something to drink and eat. And call back if I had any questions.
Victor (bless his heart) was so excited about riding on an airplane; he quickly recovered from this torture and was pretty happy.
Of course, once they were off -- as I was vacuuming I found it -- on the white part of the staircase -- hiding. Arg.
Lessons learned --- when you are packing put the kiddo in the car 1st -- at least strapped in they can't get into much -- have one parent be the car minder and pack the stuff as the other person brings it -- if this isn't possible - lock them inside at least.
Go find a child-proof travel container for meds
When it's quiet -- they are getting in trouble
Call poison control before torturing your child.
In case you need a smile (and aren't easily offended) click here and if you want to see a good movie -- go see Juno. Get in your car. Go see it.
Hey universe -- thanks for watching out for the boy this afternoon -- and thanks for watching out for them as they travel. I appreciate it. I love them boys.
We were going to go to Charleston, but instead we went to New York to visit Yuri's good friends and Victor's godfather. It's amazing how different life is here. It's just a matter of getting used to the differences, but it's still amazing to take it all in. The subway (it's above ground here, so I should call it the train) but it's outside the window and we can watch it pass by - Victor is in love.
Considering the drive (it took 10 hours), Victor did great. He loved watching the trucks going by, and was giving us the running truck commentary. We went to the huge Cabella's store somewhere in PA, it was a pretty big hit w/Victor they had an airplane, lots of stuffed animals and a fish pond. Fun.
Tomorrow we'll go to the Russian part of Brooklyn so Yuri can get some food and Victor can get some culture. We'll try to visit the Statue of Liberty - at least the state park which is near where we're staying in Jersey City.
More to come.
(A picture from the birthday archives of Victor towing a couple buddies in the wagon around the park - we were all surprised he could pull them both!)Touch down -- Victor & Yuri made it to California -- phew. Victor thought he would rattle our cage a little by starting to throw up at 4 in the morning, which made things stressful -- wondering if we should cancel, or reschedule, etc. But in the end, it was a one time deal, so they went and it went smoothly! Ahhhh..
It's even better that they went because we found out (in typical fashion in my family) that my grandpa -- known as Papa, was in the hospital for 3 days (he was discharged Friday) being treated for a sudden drop in blood pressure, related to a imbalance of minerals. But I don't know if they are sugar-coating the situation for us or not -- but I'm glad that Victor & Yuri are there to spend time together and perhaps keep up to date on what's happening. Papa has been a father figure to me and is an important part of our family -- so facing his mortality isn't a walk in the park. Both Yuri and I lost our dad's early in life, so Papa is Victor's only grandfather.
It sounds like so far in the visit, Papa is really spending time with Victor, going for walks.
Here's a couple highlights from the trip so far --
Victor got a credit card out of Yuri's wallet & runs around the house shouting "MONEY..MONEY!" I wonder how he figured that out.
In the Dallas, with all the lights and people moving around, Victor managed to catch a view of the moon -- and started shouting -- MOON! MOON! Pretty cool.
Tomorrow (Friday) Victor & Yuri are going to Sacramento to visit my grandparents for 2 weeks. Yuri has a meeting for 1 week, so he'll be in San Jose. The Great'rents will be flying solo for 1 week.
This is a huge exercise in trust without a doubt.
They are as packed and prepared as they can be.
I'm sure they will have terrific adventures, and I will enjoy doing my mid-term without as much juggling.
Sorry to the lack of posts these days. Victor is in California with Yuri visiting my grandparents. Yuri has more vacation time than I do - so he braved flying solo across country. He rocks like that. As you know, a fam-obligat-ation is not the same as using your vacation time for something else -- so I'm thankful for his sweetness to our family.
My grandparents are LOVING it. Love love loving it.
Mom Esther takes him to ride on the bus -- a huge hit with the little man. Then there's the lightrail there in town. Big fun in toddlerville.
Letting Victor travel like this has been a huge learning experience in letting go & trust. Letting go of the 'control' I think I have in our day to day life. Trust in other people taking care of him and being aware of his needs. It's been good for us all. Do I miss them both -- yes! Am I enjoying some delightful mommy time -- yes!
The boys return next week, so I'll have photos & stories to share before too long!
Still no pictures to share -- my camera is sick but hopefully we'll get it operational before long. Anyone with suggestions for camera lens -- please share!
We've continued to enjoy the island life.
Last night one of Yuri's work vendors had a party at the Hard Rock Cafe for its customers -- so open bar....food & loud music -- it was great. Victor came too -- which was perfect because the music was so loud that if he hooted & hollered, no one noticed -- phew. Hurricanes are easy to drink...Blue Hawaiians aren't as smooth.....and gin & tonic isn't for me. The whole place was closed off for the party -- and it was full of engineers. He he. I love seeing this culture of people because it's so diverse --- there are people who hardly speak a speck of English....to loud frat boy types -- wide range of people. A few women thrown in but it is a overwhelmingly male dominated group.
We waited until the end of the party to see if we could win the cool geeky door prizes -- (handheld PS system...BOSE earphones....a digital picture frame) -- walking home after 8pm (I know we're such rebels) -the street was alive with music, performances of all types and people. A relaxed parade of sorts.
Today we went to the Kialua beach park on the windward side of the island -- it's a great beach. Victor wasn't interested in the water or the sand at first....all he wanted to do was watch the back-ho that was moving sand to open a river to the ocean (the sand fills it in). We sat for at least an hour in various positions watching the sand scooped and moved to a new home. Victor has really become interested in trucks, dirt movers, planes and the like. If it makes a lot of noise --- he likes it.
Yesterday he wasn't interested in the beach as much as he was interested in watching the trash truck.
Traveling with a toddler has me thinking......
- Why don't hotels have family floors set aside as needed -- so that no one is worried about early morning screams or naked kids running down the hallway...
- What about the family airline -- with a ball pit for kids to play in, wider aisles so kids could play on the floor, kid friendly food & movies and a common understanding that kids are a pain on long plane rides and we're all doing the best we can
- Japanese people really seemed drawn to children and really pay attention to Victor -- they will squat down and ruffle his hair, give him a kiss, make silly faces, and talk to him in Japanese with excitement -- I think their culture values children differently perhaps. People who were sternly taking photographs 5 seconds ago will be kneeling eye level with Victor getting silly. Not something I expected! And then there are the teen-age boys who are too cool to make eye contact with Victor, even when he's saying 'hey hey....hi hi hi' to them when we're the only ones in the elevator. No one else is even around to see them be not 101% coo. Oh well.
- Beach time = sleep time = Mom's chance to read.
It won't be long before we're back home and back into our 'normal' routine. But getting out, even if it is with a wrangly one in tow is still good. It isn't the same as a sans baby trip -- but it is still a ton of fun and getting knee deep in sand is more fun than I remember.
It's Saturday night here in Honolulu -- a town known for an active night life --- it's not quite 8 and we're headed to bed. Victor is likely asleep as I write this now...it was a fun day, so I think he's just tuckered out.
Today we started by waking up at 6:30 ---- what a treat! It was the first day we weren't showing Victor that it was still dark out & time for sleepy at 3am. Simple pleasures for simple people.
We went to the Dole Plantation & Gardens --- it was interesting. We learned all about pineapples & how they grow (one fruit takes over a year to grow and they are all harvested & planted by hand!) They had a little train we got to ride on and that was a big hit! Victor was so happy to ride it around -- tears were shed saying goodbye to the train. We then went to feed the fish -- lots of smiles for 4 quarters. It was nice because it was a large area he could run around in -- and he was smiling at everyone, so he was happy to get smiles back too. We went to the garden area, which was a little harder for him -- he wanted to run in the gardens, not on the grass -- so that the gardeners wouldn't come and thunk him, we tossed him in the stroller -- which he wasn't impressed with. I did still manage to take some pictures of the really beautiful flowers. We went to the North Shore to have lunch & then slowly made our way south -- Victor could snooze & we got to take in the views. When he did wake up - we were near Waimanalo Beach Park so we got to splash around for a little while. Because of the full moon there were Portugese Man-of-War around - but we watched out for them and didn't get stung. They would wash up on the shore and the kids around would pick them up with a stick & put them into their collection bag. There were some strong undertow currents, so we didn't splash & relax as much as we had before. I did see a sea turtle swimming around in the surf - likely eating the jelly fish.
Tomorrow we'll have breakfast with friends I knew when I lived here -- it will be fun to catch up and hear about their adventures. The conference for Yuri starts tomorrow & his presentation is on Monday -- so we'll have to put on the work hat before long.
We've made it. Phew. It was a long trip -- 6,000 miles (+/-) 3 flights, lots of bags of preztels and 3 in-flight movies --- but we're here and enjoying the island way of life alreay.
You can feel it as soon as you get here -- even if Honolulu itself is a large city -- there's a feeling of relaxation here in Hawai'i.
We are staying right across the street from Wakiki at an Surfer/Elvis 1950's kitch hotel (Wakiki Beach Hotel) -- I love the lime green walls, surf boards & aloha print bedspreads.
We went to the beach this morning -- Victor's first ocean water. He loved the sand and enjoyed playing, digging and enjoying the water. He's napping now -- tuckered out from the water play & the trip I'm sure.
Hawai'i is really a magical place -- I had forgotten how beautiful it is -- the mountains, the misty clouds, the beach - it's very cool. I also love how the different cultures mix together here -- Asians of all types, American's, Indian's and of course the native Hawaiian people too -- it's all combines to make beautiful people. The food here is a terrific fusion of Asian, Hawaiian, American -- but heavy Asian influence -- I have to take the guys to have mochi ice cream, which was a favorite of mine when I was here -- so strange to remember it was 1995 -- how can so much time have passed!
The Hawaiian culture really respects children & the elders -- one example of that is during the local news - they celebrate kids turning one (and I love the traditional Hawaiian names too!! Example --- Ronin Nogami Kekoakukehakehaikaliani Souza who's birthday was May 28th) Across the newsbar this morning was scrolling Happy Birthday and when they did the spot for the kids they described the whole family & explained that the kiddo likes to do -- very sweet. Keiki (or children) are really special here -- people say hello to kids with a genuine happiness. Men are Kine -- women - wahine. Hawaiian language pops up all over the place.
We're going to rent a car so I can take the boys to the other side of the island, which I remember as being so beautiful.
We'll have photos to post before long I'm sure.
Yep -- we're here on the home front once more. Settling back into what looks like normal to us (at least.) My mom and grandma had a terrific time with Victor and he had a fantastic time with them too! Lots of walks, carrying of sticks, having basically the world in your hands. I really love how much fun, caring, attention and silliness took place while we were away. Victor learned to seeing the "E I E I O" part of Old MacDonald and loves to sing it as much as he can now -- his little baby voice is just so sweet it hurts. He says something that passes as thank you and can point to his nose if he sees one in a picture. It must have been some sort of grandmother educational training camp.
It was terrific to have time away, which makes the time together really great. I have been recharged -- and given our wading through the toddler years -- I'm sure that was a good thing.
I learned a few things during our travels -- ya' know I'll share....
1. Travel is good: Enjoying the different pace of exploring, seeing a new place with an earnest interest & excitement -- seeing the differences and the similarities that we all share.
2. Outdoor seating is good: There were lots of families traveling with toddlers and young children (most older kids were in school) at the place we were staying -- and the ones that seemed to eat a multi-course meal without breaking a sweat were the ones eating outside -- because there weren't roads to run into -- the kids could eat and once they got ants in their pants they could play in the area around the table. They had toys and could chase lizards. Because of the little mysterious biting insects that came out after dark there weren't a ton of outdoor diners -- so the system worked well. Note to self taken.
3. You worry less when you know all is well: calling home or emailing helps to be able to put the 'what ifs' that creep into your head to rest. Hearing that everything is boring old normal is a comfort without a doubt.
4. Some peoples' cups are never full even when it's overflowing: I love to eavesdrop when I'm out in public and it's so easy because the average (mostly American) traveler talks as loud as a used car ad. In listening to these snippets -- I remembered that I am an optimistic person - Yuri is a realistic person -- a little yin and yang. As I heard people critical of just about everything - I felt sad for them somehow. I know there are things to be grumpy about in this world - but if all you look for is the bad, you miss the good that is happening to you at this very moment. If you always look for the bad, then even when the best of things happens....well it could have been better. If you have a terrific meal.....well the room was a little warm. If you stay at an awesome resort....well the beach was washed away by a Hurricane Wilma. I'll take looking on the sunny side of things, even when I'm wading through the crap that gets slung my way.
5. You learn the essentials in a different language: My Spanish is a bit rusty but I could still attempt conversation -- Spanlish is a good thing too. I learned to say "Me vive es en tu manos. No quiedo muerta ahora." My life is in your hands, I don't want death today -- I had to figure out how to tell people to be careful with the nuts - to not include them.
It worked out well until the last day. I went to bed itchy and saw I had some hives. I woke up and my bottom lip (only) was swollen, puffy, enlarged (whatever) at least twice it's normal size. It wasn't a cute look really. I walked around most of the day biting my lower lip and trying to look quizzical -- like I was trying to figure something out (like what the heck happened?!) Yuri sang "Mommy's got a fat bottom lip" to the AC/DC song "Stiff Upper lip". We concocted a story about how a beach vendor was giving collegian injections for $5 -- and we didn't know it was $5 per lip...until it was too late...and we only had $5 cash -- but by the time we arrived home, it was getting towards normal.
Can't wait to go again -- can't wait to take the boy -- can't wait to get back into what normal is for us (organized chaos) -- can't wait for my bottom lip to be symmetrical with the top one.
Because we were at the spa -- and it creeps people out if you're in their snapping away. :) So I didn't take any pictures (if you can believe it)
We listened to the membership information (basically pre-paying for the hotel portion of the visit for 40 weeks at a discount) and we got a nice credit to use in the spa.
Love the spa.
Yuri was happy to visit the hydrotherapy area for a little while and then go lay on the beach. He was earnestly surprised when he realized he was in the topless portion of the beach. I think by the end of the afternoon he said "ya know boobs are boobs" But I still think he was surprised at the boldness of the topless ladies because he would poke me and say "oh there's another one".
I enjoyed the hydrotherapy area -- steam room, mineral tubs, a foot bath and a cold shower from every direction (yikes!). All the services were great. (massage, body scrub & pedicure) and it was super relaxing. One area by the treatment rooms had a terrific view of the pool area and ocean -- so it was neat to watch everyone bustling about while I was puddy.
As for Victor -- my mom and grandma report that he is doing well and having a great time. Now of course, they are going to leave out any sad parts -- but they sound positive, so I think that most of the time it's good stuff. My grandma said that he is keeping them in stitches laughing all the time -- which I believe because my grandma and mom love to laugh -- once one gets started the other one can't help it. If I'm there, I catch it too and it's a whole group of ladies trying not to pee their pants. It's so nice to have them with Victor -- even though I miss him and we talk about him all the time, or see things we know he would enjoy -- I am relaxed knowing that he's in loving hands.
We're going to an eco-park today -- so I'm sure there will be pictures to share before long.
Victor & I are flying on Saturday, on our own to meet Yuri, my mom & brother in San Diego. I've flown before with Victor, solo even -- but this will be the first flight where he will be ACTIVE, MOBILE and have an OPINION about how things will go. But I am prepared to make it go a smoothly as it can with the following:
1: roll of tape --- many moments can be taken with wonderful tape. What fun it is to play with tape. If I could bring a roll of aluminum foil I would.
2: new truck toy, palm sized, does not make a sound, with the tags on -- because you know the tag is the best part
3: a remote control, without batteries -- he can try and try to change the channels.
4: baby leash -- so while we're in Detroit he can run & burn off energy. If I remember right, I think they have a playground there, we'll find it for sure. With this age group having a longish layover is a good thing.
5: mini-bags of goldfish -- to prevent major spills
6: big smiles & a roll with it attitude -- because it will only be so long and I think he'll be pretty excited to look out the window & see what's going on.
Say a little prayer that our trip is safe, uneventful & full of helpful strangers (who I will gladly let help me along) Say a prayer that the seat next to us is empty -- I could contain him in a little Victor flying pack n' play.
Today I had dental work done -- from 10 - 12:30 in the chair -- I had to watch CNN (all Anna Nicole, all the time) and my face feels like someone punched me. Dang. My dentist is very kind and gives me a fleecy blanket to cozy up with while they drill -- simple pleasures.
My friends Felecia & Kevin came over to have dinner. A neighbor dropped off her kids for a 45 minute gap between when she left & her husband came home. Kevin remarked that there was too much reality going on as we cleaned up the flung food, tried to contain the toddler toy whirlwind, the older boy needed help with pooping on the potty and someone was crying for some reason or another. Yep. Toddler daze reality for sure!
