Lead Baby

The boys are headed to California to visit my grandparents (while Yuri works, Victor hangs out with my grandparents). It's always a huge exercise in trust for me to let Victor travel like that.
I know he is always surrounded by people who care for him and watch him like a hawk -- but it's still hard as a mom to let him go 3,000 miles away like that. I think of how lucky Victor is that he gets to spend so much time with his great-grandparents -- hopefully deep in his head some memories of them will be imprinted in there.

Here's a lesson in don't leave them for a second -
We were in the process of getting ready to take the boys to the airport -- I was putting away all the toys that Victor had pulled out in his nap less afternoon (i.e.: all of them) and Yuri was carrying bags up and down the stairs -- the gate wasn't locked, so Victor went upstairs and poked around the diaper bag -- that had Yuri's meds for the trip in it (do you know where this is heading?).

Like most times when they are getting in trouble - it became strangely quiet.
Suddenly it hits you that it's quiet and as I went upstairs, I saw pills all over the carpet - vitamins, meds, and fish oil -- a pile of OH CRAP!
He was jumping on his bed, excited to go to the airport -- I asked him if he ate any medicine, he said no.....but I didn’t' want to trust that he knew what I was asking him -- so I took him to the bathroom and stuck my finger in his throat.
He gagged but didn't throw up.
I asked him to just throw up in my hand (like he had done when he was sick) but this was not something he was interested in. I tried it a couple more times with no luck.
I called his pedi to ask if they had any vomit inducing tricks - they said I should call poison control. By this time Yuri had accounted for all but one pill -- so I called poison control.
They were great -- asked lots of questions and said that he would be ok. The pill he might have scarfed is bitter, so they didn't think it was likely if he crunched it, he would swallow it because of the taste - and since he didn't have any white residue in his mouth, the poison control lady was pretty sure he didn't have anything and would be ok. The pill in question is for ADD/Anxiety so it wouldn't hurt him if he had 1 -- 100..maybe, but one would just make him sleepy.
But to she told me to
1. Stop sticking my finger in his mouth
2. Give him something to drink and eat. And call back if I had any questions.

Victor (bless his heart) was so excited about riding on an airplane; he quickly recovered from this torture and was pretty happy.
Of course, once they were off -- as I was vacuuming I found it -- on the white part of the staircase -- hiding. Arg.
Lessons learned --- when you are packing put the kiddo in the car 1st -- at least strapped in they can't get into much -- have one parent be the car minder and pack the stuff as the other person brings it -- if this isn't possible - lock them inside at least.
Go find a child-proof travel container for meds
When it's quiet -- they are getting in trouble
Call poison control before torturing your child.
In case you need a smile (and aren't easily offended) click here and if you want to see a good movie -- go see Juno. Get in your car. Go see it.

Hey universe -- thanks for watching out for the boy this afternoon -- and thanks for watching out for them as they travel. I appreciate it. I love them boys.

Really....can it be true? It isn't too far now & it will be 22 months, and the official start of 2 is right around the corner (believe me, we've already had a good taste of it)

It was 2 years ago this July, I was swollen, asked to be restful and hanging out in the recliner. It was 2 years ago July 1st that I was having preterm labor at 30 weeks, scared that I was going to have a three pound baby. It was 2 years ago that I was pretty sure if you told me I would grow a tail as just another aspect of pregnancy not everyone experiences, I would have believed you.

And now, 2 years later we have found a place for a the gear we were overwhelmed with at the time, mastered the 5 minute bath and found the real potential for love our hearts hold.

I wouldn't trade it for anything for sure.

Are there days that are hard --- uh, without a doubt.

But as one mom said when we were in Hawaii, the times it's the hardest are when you have a task that you want to do, and can't get to it (float on the raft alone, read on the beach, take a nap in the sun, make a dinner that doesn't come out of a box & involve orange dust) so just understand that those things won't happen (for now) and enjoy what you are doing.

I understood exactly what she was saying.

I get itchy the most when I want to do X, Y or Z and keep getting interrupted and stopped -- and V just wants to throw the ball -- he doesn't understand that mom just wants to send an email or read an article.
My to-be read pile is larger than it was 2 years ago - but I am a happier mom for that -- and that is a little slice of wonder for sure.

for those wondering when will she post a dang picture already!.....new lens have arrived, pictures should not be far off.

Victor is on the mend I believe -- phew. He seems to have a smile now & again and doesn't just want to be held all the time. I did enjoy he cuddly needs but when it was coupled with crying that got kinda old after a while.
Today during a lap session we watched an interesting program about snakes. He was totally into it -- this kid loves animals without a doubt. He has a marvelous sound he makes when he sees an animal -- it's on the high pitched side of things and he'll often say "Hi" at the same time.
He also loves music -- today we were walking to the oil change place & a car passed with a thumping bass --- he stopped walking, started swinging his arms and bouncing up & down on his little legs. So far I would say he likes hip-hop, bluegrass, classic rock & roll and jingles on TV. More than once he's stopped what he's doing when a particularly good jingle is on to bust a move toddler style. Yuri asked today what instrument should we get for him -- drums, keyboard, guitar. After Lynn heard a brief Victor harmonica concert - she mentioned that John Lennon started with the harmonica.....those are big shoes to even consider -- but it's nice to know what these music musings are good for the little guy.
Speaking of musical musings -- does anyone want to join us at a Dan Zanes concert in July ? I think we're going to do the pajama party on Friday night since somehow I'm signed up for the GRE the following morning (WTF...I mean really)

When I heard someone say their child was 20 months (or so) I would cringe -- kids seemed so ucky at that stage -- ornery, dripping and running in 101 different directions. And, yes the boy is ornery, dripping and runs like the wind -- but as I stand knee deep in toddlerhood -- it really isn't so bad after all.

I think what toddlerhood has been like so far reminds me a lot of listening to the radio -- even when there's a bad song, don't stress about it because something good will come on before long.
I could stress, and spend all day changing the channel, getting my panties in a bundle-- but I would never really find that one song I really wanted to hear.
This way -- I'm pleasantly surprised when an old favorite comes on and come to find new songs that get my grove on.
Moods change quickly in toddler world, so I just have to ride out the grumps and whines -- because before long, smiles will emerge. I try to give him a wide berth of opportunities in the house -- today he was happy to mix crackers with several wooden spoons & mashed some crackers to smithereens. He's figured out how to turn the TV on/off, change the channel. He's called 911 and hung up -- they called back...
Taking the radio station metaphor to the next level -- I was thinking about how much I loved the TOP 40 shows on Sundays when I was a kid -- I wonder what the top 40 of toddlerhood would be. Ideas? Thoughts? Please share....I'll have to figure that one out.

Need a diverson -- try this, that and the other thing

Cute moments:

• Emma says "bye-bye Victie" when Victor leaves the babysitter's house.
• He learned about blinking -- and was entralled with my blinking quickly & would laugh and then give me a big hug -- this went on for several minutes.
• Did I mention that Victor hugs are pretty much the coolest thing ever -- we still have the urge to live in his ear because we love him so much -- but we'll have to settle for hugs instead.
• Yuri passed his motorcycle class - so he can ride his Vespa with confidence that he knows safety -- today Victor had pulled off his diaper, so running around comando style at the front door - he watched Yuri zip up the street.

Every day we are learning things in our house. For example today we learned that if Victor is playing with my keys while we're in the grocery store (not out in the parking lot, but inside) and he pushes the red panic button....it will set the alarm off. Yep. Hard to know how long the alarm was going off before we learned about that. Sorry about that if you were at the Harris Teeter at 9:00 this morning (the unGodly time)

We learned that in the spring time you have to give a bath everyday because dirt just sticks to him, and I think he loves it. Dirty little boys are something to behold.

We learned that other parents judging each other can be a real downer. I was at the Target on Friday and a big kid (8-10) was having a melt down. Screaming, rigid body, not making any sense. The mother that tucked him under her arm & was walking out. The lady next to said to me "Tsk, well I never..." I thought to myself, there but by the grace of God go I....or anyone really. Who knows what that kid's needs were, what issues that family was dealing with -- but who am I to tsk! tsk! -- I said a little prayer for them that everything worked out ok -- the child was able to regroup, mom kept her patience and their afternoon went along ok. Sarah had mentioned that our children choose us -- and I thought a lot about that on Friday.

I've also learned that checking in is good. Victor does it all the time. He'll be playing run over, touch me & run back to do what needs to be done in his world. A parent is like a little beacon, a guide and it's always nice to know it isn't too far away. I've learned that my mommy buddies are my beacons as well. I can check in, ask questions, wonder, re-group. I'm thankful that they treat my concerns, questions and rants (here and there) with patience and respect.

I've learned that kids eat free night is a beautiful thing. First, the likelihood of other little wilds is good. This means that no one will bunch their panties if a fry is tossed, someone is eating with their shirt off or ketchup really is a veggie. Second it's good because toddler (at least this one) eating habits change like the clouds. They loved mac n'cheese the other day....today, no way. Chicken tenders....up turned nose....green beans- today, that's where it's at. Last night, no way. So it's nice when you don't have to pay over $5.oo for a basket of fries (cold even) and a chicken tender.

I've also learned that there should be a different size for skinny babies. Around the waist he's 12-18 months, in the leg 24 months. So if he wears his 24 month shorts, they fall off (literally). 12 monthers and the boy is wearing daisy dukes. Not a good look for a little boy. Suspenders....belts....duct tape....I did find overalls at the last consignment sale I went to. I think they will be a good thing for sure.

I've learned that weaning isn't easy for mom & baby. It's the end of an era for us both. Everyday at work I aggregate the news -- Middle East & Africa -- not always known for touchy, rosy news stories. And I as I read, I have urge, deep in my bones to protect Victor from pain, hurt, suffering -- to guide him towards good, opportunity, hope. Being able to breastfeed him, to offer comfort and safety, to offer nourishment that my body knows how to make for him - it's a good thing. In those moments of our day, as I feed him, all is good. But it is time for the process to begin - mostly because I will be traveling without him in May & the breast pump doesn't do as good a job as it did earlier. I don't want to have mastitis in Mexico...not good. I will find new ways to comfort, and he'll learn new ways too. Parenting is a balance of holding on and letting go.

Victor is watching Baby Einstein because he didn't nap & was feeling grumpy -- rather than have him run around grumping (crashing into things, falling down and crying) I sat him down & he's chillin' with BE. It's the one about animals -- which he's really interested in. Whenever the lions or tigers come on, he makes his 'oh it's a cat' humming sound, which he does when he sees Emma. It's so sweet. You just want to hug him all day long. Bedtime won't be long now, another snack, a little cozy bath and it's off to slumber time for little man.

Today Victor got to see his first snow. He didn't really know what to think -- at first he was interested to wipe it off the car, but after a little while, he was more interested in running around outside. He figure out he didn't like the snow when his mittens fell off & then he ran into the snow -- he didn't know how cold it really was and that the mittens served their purpose. Ahhh, learning from experience.

After attempting a nap I brought him into the office where I was downloading photos (more to come) and he knocked over the shredder.

Oh, you mean the shredder that hasn't been emptied for so long that the paper shreds have almost taken on a solid quality? You mean the one that's filled to overflowing?

Yep.....that one.

So there's some paper that needs to be cleaned up -- and I'm a big fan of logical consequences, so I told Victor he needed to help Mommy clean up. We went and got the vacuum cleaner, removed all the attachments until it was the basic nozzle, and showed him what I wanted to do.....and he did it. He vacuumed up a good part of the paper. We needed to get a new vacuum bag because of the quantity of paper (and it did smell vaguely of Christmas pine needles too).
After the chore was done, I let him just mess about with the vacuum, remembering that I thought that was pretty much the most fun thing to do as a kid. It must be genetic because he did too. I was cleaning up something else and I feel the nozzle sucking on the back of my shirt and hear a giggle. Then I hear the familiar sound of facial skin getting sucked -- I turned around and he was sucking his lips with the nozzle -- he would pull it away LAUGH and do it again! The poor vacuum worked hard today, but it was worth it for sure. Is 16 months too young to get assigned a chore?

I think that it's important to tie a 'punishment' (don't think that's really the correct word) to what went wrong -- if you make a mess, you clean it up - if you eat cat food, you might get a belly ache and throw up - if you run away when Mommy's trying to get you dressed, you might wipe out and that's just what happens. Of course there will be actions should never be taken and reactions that you can't live with (IE: drugs, guns, etc) but I think it's important to make the connection between actions and reactions -- that what I do impacts myself and others -- I'm amazed at how many grown-ups don't always get this basic idea.