These days

Summer is clicking along -- most days involving getting soaked while watering the plants, pulling off the diaper and then running around the house laughing...but enough about me (ha!)
Victor continues to transform before our eyes -- growing taller -- looking more and more like a little boy -- but still needing the tenderness of being little. (don't we all still want that really?)
We've all been working hard on being good at discipline -- like anticipating his needs, drawing a line & sticking to it (easier said than done at times) and being consistent with it all (as best you can with 3 adults coming in and out of the day).
Here's what we've learned so far.....

  1. Be calm -- remember not to take part in the childish behavior yourself by getting wild, angry, yelling, etc -- basically acting a lot like you would like him not to.
  2. Give him space -- if he's having a hard time -- sometimes I just leave him be. He can cry and kick and grump -- and I'm going to leave him alone. I've even walked him to the other room & said, you can be angry over here (vs. in the middle of the kitchen, in front of the stove, while I'm cooking dinner).
  3. He likes a dark room -- yesterday he came home in a grumpy mood. Nothing made him happy - and we tried it all. So I held his hand and walked him over to the half-bath we have downstairs & let him cry in there. Lights off, no one there to watch. Listening outside the door, once I heard the crying slow, I asked if he wanted to come out -- he looked at me and closed the door. I opened it for him and for the next 20 minutes he would come out and when he got overwhelmed (maybe all that news about the conflicts in Pakistan), he would walk himself back into the bathroom, shut the door and cry some more. Perhaps he really just wanted to have the plunger all to him self (some of the cool toddler-contra-band found the bathroom) but after a little while he seemed better.
  4. Pressure -- we learned from his early education teacher that he likes deep pressure -- so if he's having a hard time to give his legs and arms nice gentle but hard squeezes. Another suggestion was to make a Victor sandwich -- putting him between 2 large pillows and squish them together a bit. We tried it tonight and he did seem more relaxed. She said it helps to give them physical feedback & since he isn't really chatting it up yet, it helps give all that energy that might go into talking a place to go.

The pressure thing also made me think about the fact that we weened him in May and that when he was at long last completely weened -- he lost a lot of holding, snuggling and body contact time. Even if towards the end it wasn't a lot -- he still was getting a lot of touch time breastfeeding. Ah-ha -- even if we're not breastfeeding we still need to snuggle -- not rocket science but important for sure.

In other news -- I took the GRE last week (again -- last time was 1998) and I did ok -- good enough hopefully to go to library school. Getting the application's's in-state....It will take me a long time, once class at a time....but it's all good!


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